Forty is the New Thirty

Above: Lily of the Valley, May’s birth month flower. Delicate, tiny white teacup-shaped flowers are striking against the vibrant green leaves.

May 20, 2026

I don’t know about you, but here in northern New England, we’re finally experiencing some consistently nice weather. With my late-spring birthday just around the corner, I couldn’t be happier to put this past winter behind me. In fact, I’m happy to put the last decade behind me. More on that later. First, a few updates.

Updates

Rise of Iron (Tredania Chronicles, book one): In case you missed it, I decided to rewrite this book rather than edit in-document, like I usually do. I talked about my reasoning for why I did this in my previous blog post. Check out that post’s updates section for more details.

Today’s update is, I finished the rewrite this past Saturday! I’ve uploaded the draft to Vellum (the book formatting software I use) and will read it while on vacation (more on that later, too). After that, I’ll either self publish it or query it again. I haven’t decided which, so stay tuned.

Unnamed (Tredania Chronicles, book two): When this series came to me a few years ago, I created titles and one paragraph summaries for all eight books. Crazy? Perhaps. But now I have a starting point for book two, and I’m eager to get started. I’ll begin outlining it soon, and dive into it shortly thereafter.

Middle Grade Story 2.0: I knew I’d have to write a story for my niece (she all but demanded it when I gifted Mission Aboard the Longfin to her brother), but I didn’t have any solid ideas for it… until our trip to Ireland a few weeks ago. The plot’s still revealing itself, but it’s only a matter of time.

Cozy Fantasy Standalone: Joke’s on you all, I actually have TWO of these. One is fully outlined, and I’m excited to write it. The other is mostly outlined in my mind, but I’m waiting for a spark of inspiration to put the final touches on the plot. I expect that spark to happen while we’re on vacation, for reasons.

Milestone Birthdays

To celebrate my husband’s 40th birthday last fall, we spent two weeks in Japan. He spent months planning it, and it went off without a hitch. It was an unforgettable (if not a little overwhelming for me), once-in-a-lifetime trip, although I’m fairly certain he’d go back tomorrow if he could.

But he can’t—because today we start my 40th birthday trip.

As with most milestones, it causes one to reflect on the past or the future. In this blog post, I’ll do a bit of both.

Good Riddance

“What are you most looking forward to in your forties?” is a question I’ve been asked a lot lately. No matter who asks, my answer is always the same: “To not being in my thirties.”

For most people who have lived long enough to have some perspective, they often say their thirties was their favorite decade of life. I can understand why. Many start their families, secure a stronger position in their career, and genuinely feel “put together” in adulthood.

None of that is true for me.

I spent a majority of my thirties trying to become a mother. Years of failed infertility treatments led to declining mental health, where I found myself deep in depression and existential crisis. At the same time, I was in a career where I exceeded expectations in my role, but never received proper (any) advancement. Despite being overqualified for management positions, I was overlooked and all but told to continue waiting.

During this time, my physical health also suffered. I stopped running, because I thought that maybe the exertion was impacting my ability to get pregnant. That decline in physical activity led to me gaining weight, which added to the depression. Later in my thirties, I started noticing thinning, receding hair, and general brain fog. Early signs of perimenopause. Awesome.

And on top of all of that, my mother passed away.

What a decade.

Forty is the New Thirty

Recently, my therapist told me, “Your thirties have basically been an on-going midlife crisis, but I think your forties are going to be a much better decade for you.”

I think so, too.

Don’t get me wrong, my thirties weren’t a total flop. My husband and I traveled the world, bought a beautiful home, and adopted three affectionate black cats (one passed in 2023). I also took a leap of faith and left my corporate job to pursue my passion for writing fantasy novels. All of that has paid off in a multitude of ways.

Truthfully, the last 1-2 years of my thirties were the best of the decade. There are many reasons for this. I published five books; I’ve come to accept my childless fate; I’m discovering things about myself that, in hindsight, make so much sense (like being a highly sensitive person); I’ve rediscovered my enjoyment of running. All of these things have improved my mental health, given me a much-needed boost of confidence, and offered a positive new perspective on what’s to come.

In hindsight, my thirties weren’t so bad. I discovered who I was, not what society (or people in my life) expected me to be. I’m doing what I love, and have a very supportive and loving husband who encourages me to continue down that path. I’m at the point where most people who are on the cusp of the big 3-0 are—ready to embrace a new decade of life, knowing it will be their best yet.

New Decade, New Aspirations

As I enter my forties, I’m only looking forward, dreaming up new aspirations for myself and my career.

For myself, I already mentioned that I’ve picked up running again. The first time I kicked up the speed on the treadmill, I was reminded of how strong and confident I felt while running before. It was something I did for me, and me alone. I lost that for a while, but I’m happy to have it back.

I’m also going to protect my peace. I think this is mostly a side effect of perimenopause kicking in, but I just… don’t want to engage with things I don’t enjoy. Negative people on social media, some social events, the news, the rare argument with my husband, whatever. If it doesn’t positively (or at least, not negatively) resonate with my inner peace in some way, I’m allowing myself to kindly step aside.

Career-wise, I want to get traditionally published. My first series has been mostly well-received, and still sees a high volume of sales and page reads each month (thank you!). This is great momentum, which is what literary agents and publishers want to see. It might not happen with Rise of Iron, but the couple of standalone novels I mentioned above are good candidates.

Maybe it’s selfish, but I yearn to see my books in Barnes & Noble. I have ten years to make this happen, and for the first time in my writing career, I’m confident enough to know it will.

Life is Short

This has already gone on much longer than I expected, so I’ll close it out with this. If there’s one thing I’ve come to embrace over the last year or so, it’s that life is too short for worrying about the “what ifs” or “could have beens”. Instead, I’m focusing on meeting myself where I am right now.

Not a mother—the cool aunt.

Not a public relations manager—a published author.

Not living in a busier town with sidewalks—enjoying the quiet of our house on a cul-de-sac.

None of it is what I envisioned for myself, but all of it is exactly where I need to be.

——

Now, if you’ll excuse me. My husband and I are about to head to Logan Airport for my 40th birthday trip to Germany, Switzerland, and Liechtestein. I’ll be back in June with lots of pictures, and likely a few extra pounds of cheese and cheese. Whether that’s on my hips or in my carry-on remains to be seen.

Until then, be well, and stay creative.

~Sarah